Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Only in Ty's world!

This story is just too funny to keep to myself!!

Last night I was talking to a friend from college that I have not talked to in many months. I had to cut things short because Tyler came downstairs screaming that he has bunny food up his nose!! How did it get there? Ty was lying on the floor (by the bunny cages) and Bryce was jumping on his back. His head bumped the floor and he breathed in at the same time. His nose was right over some spilled rabbit food and one went up his nose and is now stuck!! Now, you might be thinking this sounds too far-fetched. You must keep in mind that Tyler is my accident child. I have had him to the Dr. more times than I care to admit for very bizarre happenings!!

I could not see anything up his nose. I felt around outside and could feel a small lump way up almost to his eyes!! I thought for sure that I was going to be making an ER run. But I tried one last ditch effort with plugging the other side and having him blow really hard. It took three tries, but at last the little pellet came flying out!! Lesson learned: "Mom, I don't think I will lay down by the bunny cages again."

God cares about $4 coffee

The depth of God's care continues to amaze me! My prayer through the events of recent times has been more of a plea. My pastor had told me it would take a solid year or more for the ex to really begin to prove he might be worthy of taking back. But when you really put that into real life, how do I keep my heart in a neutral position for that long?!! So, my prayer was that if this man was not for real, then reveal it soon. And what amazes me is that God, in His grace, cares about silly female emotions. Within just a little over a week, I knew without a doubt that things really are over for good. He is now back with the mistress and no longer interested in righting things with God.

The title of my post is about $4 coffee. Here's the explanation. One of my new vices is Starbucks. I can't stand to think that I pay $4 for ONE latte, but MMmmm!! So, being on the tight budget of a single mom with four kids, I allow myself one per week. With my recent Sunday off work (my sick time does not kick in until Dec.) my paycheck was rather short this time. While there is enough for the bills, it's slim pickin's for the next two weeks. Can I live without Starbucks for two weeks? Of course, but I was secretly grieving my loss of my "comfort food." But, alas! This story has a happy ending!! When I got to church on Sunday, I was handed a beautiful card of encouragement from a sweet older lady. Guess what was inside? A gift card to Starbucks!!!! The Lord really does care about the little things!

Times passed

A friend sent me the following forward with the attached message: "Please don't take this lightly as some of us may have in years past. And praise the Lord for the Years Have Passed!! Take a minute to let that statement sink in!

Malachi 3:3 says: "He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver." This verse puzzled some women in a Bible study and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God. One of the women offered to find out the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible Study. That week, the woman called a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest beyond her curiosity about the process of refining Silver. As she watched the silversmith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities. The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot; then she thought again about the verse that says: "He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver." She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time the silver was being refined. The man answered yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed. The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silversmith, "How do you know when the silver is fully refined?" He smiled at her and answered, "Oh, that's easy -- when I see my image in it."

Friday, October 19, 2007

Just thought I would send along some recent pics of the most handsome baby around! The top one does not show much of the outfit but-- GO RED SOX! The bottom one is Judson enjoying his first teething biscuit.


Yesterday afternoon I had one of those mom moments that will make any girly girl like myself squirm. I had been yakking on the phone with my sister, when I realized it was 3:15. That is the exact time I have to be pulling out of the driveway to go to the bus stop or I will be late!! I quickly hung up with the sis, plopped the baby in his car seat, and hollered for the boys to load up in the van- QUICK! Tyler comes sauntering over from the yard and hold his hands out for me, "but mom, what do I do with Stickers?" "Stickers" proved to be a wriggling, slimy lizard of some sort. I screamed and jumped back- Ty just laughed. We quickly found a container for him to carry his new pet in, for he HAD to take it to the bus stop to show all the older kids! Of course, we did end up being a few minutes late, but Kristen quickly forgot that upon seeing our new "pet."

I must say, once I could look at "Stickers" from the safety of a Gladware container, it was very fascinating! It looked just like the gecko on TV only brown and very skinny and only about three inches long. Anybody got any ideas what it was? Oh, yea, it must have been very delicate as well, because it only survived the afternoon. So, my all boy of a son had a dead lizard in a baggie for show-n-tell today!

Tuesday, October 16, 2007


Just thought I would post a bit of an update to last week. He went to church Sun. morning, but blew off Sun. night (there was a big Patriots game on) with the lame excuse that his back hurt. He continues not follow some of the basic instructions that Pastor has given him. Pastor counsels me to be "business as usual." Then last night my sister in law called. She is the baby of the family and has always had a close relationship with Rodney. She begged me NOT to take him back. She would not give me details because she said they would hurt me too much, but not to believe anything that he says because he is not being honest with me. I praise God for people who are so blunt and honest with me and are not just saying to take him back no matter what. My little ones and myself really are better off on our own than to be daily barraged with an ungodly influence such as that. Continue to pray!

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

April 9th revisited

Oh, it seems the only blogging I do is when something is heavy on my heart! Maybe I will join was it Ann-Marie or Tancy?- with some resolutions before the new year hits! I promise I will try to blog more about life in general here is this busy household!

But on to what is heavy on my heart. On Apr. 9 my world was turned upside down with my then husband's admission of multiple affairs and leaving. This Sunday, almost six months to the day, he flipped it upside down again. I arrived at my in-laws house just like I do every Sunday after church. They watch the kids for me while I get a few hours of sleep before heading to work again. I was especially tired this week and couldn't wait to hand the baby over to mom and crawl into bed. No such luck. Rodney was there and he wanted to talk to me. We went upstairs to the family room and he proceeded to burst into tears and tell me what a mess he had made of things! He hoped I could find it in my heart to forgive him but understood if I could not. He told me he had moved back home with his parents and wanted to get his life back on track.

I am sure most of you are jumping out of your skin for joy right about now. Please sit back down and just say a quick prayer for him- and me. While he is full of regret for the things he has done, he is showing very little signs of repentance. He met with our pastor on Mon. Pastor has told me he was very "mechanical" in his responses. Rodney knows all the right things to say. However, it took much prodding for him to get out that he has sinned. He keeps saying he has messed up. He also will not answer any questions about why the sudden break-up with his girlfriend. Just a week ago, he was telling me that he would not do "the God thing" ever again. When questioned about what changed so quickly, he just says it is a lot of little things.

On to my feelings. I had closed the book on us. I had come to the conclusion that this part of my life was over. I was looking forward to the Lord eventually bringing someone new into my life. How on earth do I ever trust this man again?!!! Not to mention that the thought of even kissing him completely repulses me. I can not even imagine taking him back. This is not to say that I have not forgiven his sin. The anger is gone, but the hurt is still very fresh, and to open myself back up for that...

Not to worry, though. I have been counseling extensively with my pastor this week, and he has given me much freedom. First, he has told me I have NO decisions to make at this time. There will be no marriage counseling because there is no marriage. Rodney is just like any other "fish in the sea." He has to prove that he is worthy of my possible affection. This will take a min. of a year for our pastor. He has counseled Rodney to attend a different church in our area (one of like faith and practice) and he will have great accountability there. Next, I am under no biblical obligation to ever take him back. He divorced me. He gave up the right to be with me then. I must forgive him, but forgiveness does not always have to mean restitution. Now, it may be in the best interests of the kids, but only if he becomes the Godly man that he should be. Why would I take back a man that will just revert back to his old ways a year from now?!

The final thing to consider is that because we are divorced, it would be sin to allow him back into the home without being married. WOW! That had not really entered my mind. So, all of this to say that while he has made some baby steps toward wanting to reconcile, it seems it is just because his little world crashed down on him-- did I mention he is also having to file bankruptcy?!!-- it will be at a min. of 18 months before we, if ever, are remarried.

I told him that with God all things are possible. I do believe this with all my heart. I ask you to lift me up for this. I have no trust or desire whatsoever in this man. It will take a huge act of God's moving for me to love him again.